Rhythm of Life

Growing UP

2011-06-12T04:49:00.000-07:00

Have been such a long time never update my blog.

The reason is, lazy and do not have any writing in my mind.

How could today will have the mood to write ? because i realize I need to grow up.and I need to write it down , before the next second , what is in my thought today.

Grow up means spending less time in FB.

Grow up means bearing more responsiblity and be mature.

Grow up means dressing like a mature lady and think properly before any action is taken.

I dont hate growing up, but I am scare growing up. Scare the stress which i need to bear.

I feel really happy when everyday, I wake up with nothing in my mind. walking in the forest, going to the sea. I think my happiest days when I was in university, driving the car, rounding the island. :) those old days.

I really wish I am Peter Pan, live in Neverland, playing with mermaids and fairies.

Life oh Life, I wish I can be a child. Spare me, but I love to be who I am.

Thnking about it , I ask myself , what makes me Happy? I could not find the answer. But I only know whats makes me not happy.

Is growing up means happiness is hard to be found?

Down

2010-07-24T06:44:00.000-07:00

I am DOWN because of you.

Life is getting routine

2010-06-28T08:09:00.000-07:00

My Life is getting routine.

Is this a good sign ? or bad sign? looking for some excitement, but not sure what excites me anymore.

Share with you something from my Keel's Diary

To share a fantasy is another fantasy :)

Sleeping Beauty

2010-03-14T05:29:00.000-07:00

I never realize I can sleep for so long,

You might ask me , how long ,

and I will answer you, 20 hours per day....

Oh my gosh , what happen to me ? Houston saying that I just waste my time by sleeping, but the truth is , I feel really tired , and I really love to sleep.

Sleeping Beauty :)

LAZY :(

2010-03-07T05:36:00.000-08:00

After the Chinese New Year, I found out I am just too tired.

Physically tired, mentally tired...And I really demand long hours of sleep.

SLEEEEEEPPPPPPP.

Happy 2010 and Greetings from Hong Kong

2010-02-21T07:07:00.000-08:00

I guess it have been quite a while I did not update my blog.

Now is the time to say HI, 2010, Hi friends, and I am doing fine in a new happening place, Hong Kong!!

More updates will be coming , and I wish you guys all the best for this coming one year.

xoxoxoxo

Cooking-My new hobby

2009-10-25T06:52:00.000-07:00

If you are close to me , you will know that I never be a good cook. As I really don’t know how to cook. But last week , Snow who just came back from Europe and I went to Wal Mart to buy some raw vegetables , and we decide to cook for ourselves. Houston, Benny ( who managed to being promoted and work in Newegg) came to our place and try this delicious Canton food.

The cooking habit seems like did not stop me after Snow's visit. I decided to cook again for soup and also some simple dishes. And again, I succeed.

So I decided to call for house party, as you can see , I am stress and also sad with Gigi's pased away. So the house party hopefully will cheer me up a bit.So yesterday , Joyce, You you, Linda, Wei Ran and Jing Ye came to my place for house party. It is really fun to have friends around , and we played Uno card games. I urged so much people to play Si Chuan Mahjong with me , but none of them show interest. We also watched the popular show , Happy Family from the Mango's Tv channel. Everyone seem like enjoy the party especially with my food , and also my cocktail.

Anyway ,dear friends, I am learning to cook more and more food.Perhaps one day , I can open one restaurant in Beijing , which also serves as art gallery. And you are always welcome to my place, to share your cooking experience :)

My rabbit- Gigi

2009-10-25T06:49:00.000-07:00

Last week, after Houston and I finish our dinner at Wudaokou , we plan to have a walk along the street. This come with a pet seller , who sell gold fish , rabbits and also hamsters. As you all know , I am not a pet lover. As I think it is really time consuming to take care of the pets. But as I look into this rabbit eyes,it seems like telling me to buy her back. it is shaking its body as it really feel cold. With the sympathy , we decided to buy it home. We named this rabbit as Gigi , as it is no other better names we could figure out. When gigi is in our home , it looks so scare of the environment , but after all , it seems like fine and cool with it. Gigi always demand a lot for food. I am so tired to feed Gigi with vegetable and also Carrot.But Gigi is really cute and adorable. It has a panda colour, with black eyes , and white fur.

But after one week time , When I off work and back home,Gigi just lying there without any movement. And I just scream and cried.

I will never ever take care of pet anymore , as it is really heart broken when it left me.

I will always remember you, Gigi.

Stress

2009-10-25T06:45:00.000-07:00

Today, I just did my interview with UBS. Totally blank in my mind. The night before I could not have a good rest, as I am so stress out with the interview on today 9 am. So there is a UK guy , who is the big boss for the central compliance in UBS AP region. Totally shock with the interviewer, as I will be under him if I am being successfully selected for the team.

Basically , he told me a lot about central compliance, and the difference between central compliance and business compliance. I gain a broad perspective towards IB , and also how does all the functions interrelated.

Cross my fingers for results which will be out next week. As I can see, it is really competitive for the enrollment. Pray hard if I could enroll, but if is not, it is always a good experience for me to try out the application. As I thank God for always choosing me to be in, as I knew enroll to work in Investment Bank is really competitive.

Poem that Ant dedicate to me :)

2009-08-16T00:20:00.000-07:00

Jun 6, 2009
A True Friendship
This is dedicated to Sze Yan, my closest friend in uni:

Friends on earth are never forever,
If you think so, I think you have a fever,
Not all friends are true,
And remember, only One in heaven loves you,

The time in need is the time indeed,
To look upon Him first, it's the way to lead,
Seek ye first the kingdom of God,
As the Bible tells, listen with your heart, don't just nod.

Relationship with Him, no one can redeem,
Eternal intimacy, a passion of God for you that never dims,
A true friend He will always be,
To you and I, never to Him a "maybe".

As a friend to you, I am just passing by,
All I could offer is just support and a shoulder to cry,
As how you always did the same for me,
I am here always, you know where to find me.

Love,
~ant~

Malaysia Hospitality

2009-08-10T05:35:00.000-07:00

I have been more than half year did not step on my motherland.
I reached KL when is last fri , taking our beloved MAS airline to go home.
The hospitality of MAS airline really touched my heart.
They air waiter and waitress are so friendly , and they really take good care of each passenger.
When I just step into the plane , I saw the Star , News Straits Times, Sin Chew Jit Poh, and so many local news paper.For the sake when I am staying in Beijing , I have been so long time disconnect from all these local newspaper, which I used to read everyday.
And they serve some basic Malaysian food like Chicken Rice. the taste of the food is really awesome.
Before I left the plane , they will say , selamat pulang ke Tanah Air.( which means welcome back to the motherland)

I seriously fall in love with this beautiful country , and also its hospitality. I love Malaysia :)

和你一样

2009-05-08T00:31:00.000-07:00

这个博客是致给在人生遇到失败的人，永不放弃，须知世上有许多人与你一起奋斗，命运掌握在您手。

希望这首歌能为您带来希望，人生虽时常有许多底低点，加油，为您自己加油，我们会为您鼓掌。坚强，须知雨后会出现彩虹，为你喝彩。

谁在最需要的时候轻轻拍着我肩膀
谁在最快乐的时候愿意和我分享
日子那么长
我在你身旁
随着你成长让我感到充满力量
谁能忘记过去一路走来陪你受的伤
谁能预料未来茫茫漫长你在何方
笑容在脸上
和你一样
大声唱为自己鼓掌
我和你一样
一样的坚强
一样的全力以赴追逐我的梦想
哪怕会受伤
哪怕有风浪
风雨之后才会有迷人芬芳
我和你一样
一样的善良
一样为需要的人打造一个天堂
歌声是翅膀
唱出了希望
所有的付出只因爱的力量
和你一样
谁能忘记过去一路走来陪你受的伤
谁能预料未来茫茫漫长你在何方
笑容在脸上
和你一样
大声唱为自己鼓掌
我和你一样
一样的坚强
一样的全力以赴追逐我的梦想
哪怕会受伤
哪怕有风浪
风雨之后才会有迷人芬芳
我和你一样
一样的善良
一样为需要的人打造一个天堂
歌声是翅膀
唱出了希望
所有的付出只因爱的力量
我们都一样
一样的坚强
一样的青春焕发金黄色的光芒
哪怕会受伤
哪怕有风浪
风雨之后才会有彩色阳光
我们都一样
一样的善良
一样为需要的人打造一个天堂
歌声是翅膀
唱出了希望
所有的付出只因爱的力量
和你一样
我们都一样
谁在最需要的时候轻轻拍着我的肩膀
谁在最快乐的时候愿意和我分享
日子那么长
我在你身旁
见着你成长也为你鼓掌

Y=mX+C

2009-05-06T23:36:00.000-07:00

lately , i feel so much stress in my work.

I guess this will be faced by a lot of people, a lot of times , when you are hoping to secure a job or maybe to be successful.

By God's grace, as a christian, you should shine for God,

As for myself, there are few ways for me to release my stress
1. watch comedies, which does not have special meanings.
2. eat , but you need to bear consequences like getting fat. ( which I am now trying to lose weight)
3. Health care- exercises, especially breathing.
4. go out and look for friends.
5. sleep.

By the way , I feel moderate stress will help you to be successful.is just like the Mathematics equation, y=mx+c. the stress and responsibility is always proportional.

I am leaving Beijing and head back to Malaysia in august.
Not sure precisely , where to go , but hopefully can secure a job in Singapore.
And the China's government issuing Visa is more tough than last time due to the celebration of 60th national holiday.so , is really the time to say Bye Bye

my time with Ruth CG

2009-04-02T02:50:00.001-07:00

Today , is a slow day for myself. Due to the internet speed is slow , I am just chatting with my collagues , and laugh on those silly jokes

Sometimes , people just need to lead a simple life. I like to read Vanessa’s blog , it makes me feel fall in love with my life. Thank god for me to meet her during my year in USM . I always remember those jokes that we have, calling each other siao chao po , siao ta po, siao lang , tin keh lah, those cute nicknames. And also our first time , CG outing , Ruth CG , to Batu ferringhi.

She is really like my big sister , of course with also Ruo shi , Elaine , and those siao people. And also Samuel , like him to come to our CG makan , just makan makan and makan. That’s our most fun time.

I agree with Van , saying , we like never leave penang. Penang , is a place for memory , a place where I find my energy , a place where I have my brothers and sisters. All because of God’s grace.

People, I miss you guys here in China.

MORON!!!!save the world please

2009-03-27T00:21:00.000-07:00

one of the weakness , I usually will ask myself to improve is emotional intelliegence.

But today , i really cant tahan anymore. BURSTING!!!

stupid people , always not carry their duty properly , and show that kind of face , which telling you , I DONT KNOW!!!! not carry out duty properly , like to play politics, laziness. since when people will pay for a lazy person who just show an innocent face , and say i dont know.or maybe show that you are clever , but you dont deserve to work. sometimes , even show an angry face at you.!!!

alamak , i really need to tahan . tahan , and smile. this kind of people , will just i put , FUCK YOU OFF. are all this people who are educated , but not live on values and principle, always talk about performance based , but neglect on those humanities.no values at all, no respect!! rude moron!!

SHIT!!!! FUCK!!!! go away , moron!!! I HATE YOU THE MOST!!!!

I AM SERIOUSLY PISS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i must write this out , so that i can live longer. I cant really keep all these inside myself. because of those stupid people.

God must forgive me , is my first time being so stand on those people face.

Save the world , please.

A for Apple

2009-03-22T20:47:00.000-07:00

A for apple...
B for Boy....
H for Houston....

Guess what , in the pass weekend , I spend my time with Houston to go and seek for the i phone. As you know , I phone is not been officially sell yet in China.So , we have choices from US , Hong Kong , or other places.

We had spent quite long time to discover the price, the model and etc.

And funny stories go on , which is Houston tried the whole night to explore the phone, and I just cant keep on smiling , coz he just behave like a big child.

by the way , a new i phone brings more music and pictures to our life.:)

All in All

2009-03-22T20:34:00.000-07:00

As usual, I went to church this sunday. But I discovered a new scene which really shock me. There are few hundred people who are attending the chinese service. And there are few rounds of the service.

It is not my first time to the church , but I am always at the downstair. so this time , I pay a visit to the upstair. wow, so many people are believing in Christ. :)

I would like to share with you a song , which is all in all.and this song really touches my heart.

You are my strength when I am weak

You are the treasure that I seek

You are my all in all

Seeking you as a precious jewel

Lord, to give up I'd be a fool

You are my all in all

Jesus, lamb of God

Holy is Your name(2x)

Taking my cross, my sin, my shame
Raising again I bless your name
You are my all in all
When I fall down you pick me up
When I am dry you fill my cup
You are my all in all

I am always seeking the truth of life , and I am glad that I found Him to be with me for my trip.I always believe my father will bless me , and make me to be a blessing for the people, Jesus is my all in all.

The McKinsey Quarterly

2009-03-18T00:03:00.001-07:00

The Seven Sins of Sales Management

2009-03-16T19:04:00.000-07:00

So what exactly are the ‘seven sins’? They’re a set of beliefs which sales leaders may commonly hold but very often fail to recognise in themselves: these beliefs influence a sales manager’s attitude, which in turn, affects how the sales team is managed and, ultimately, determines the performance of the individual team members.

Why are they sins? They’re ‘sins’ because these common beliefs can limit a team’s performance rather than maximising it!

But how do you know that these beliefs could be limiting the team’s performance? Prior to forming Sales and Sensibility, I spent the majority of my career in sales leadership. So the answer is simple, I have made all of the above mistakes!

Ask any successful leader if they’ve made mistakes; the answer will be yes! Great leaders believe that success comes from being able to identify their mistakes, learning from them and having the confidence and skills to adapt their current approach to improve their performance.

How do I know whether I hold these beliefs? To determine if you hold any of these beliefs please read each of the seven statements below. If you find you agree with any of it, you are holding some of the beliefs that may be holding your team back. It is crucial that you be honest with your self whilst conducting this exercise.

How can I change them to maximise my sales team’s performance? The first step towards changing beliefs is to become aware that you are holding them and understand why they could be limiting your team’s performance.

The second step is to take action. Below each of the ‘sins’ I have provided some practical tips that will start you on your journey to maximising your team’s potential.

Sin 1
One-to-ones are a great chance for me to update my sales figures and find out what my team needs from me. I always send out a summary of the actions so that I can track my team members’ performance and regularly give feedback on what they can do to improve their performance. Do you agree or disagree?

One-to-ones are not for the sales manager; they are about your salepeople.

If you simply update sales figures, what value are you getting from your one- to-ones. Rather than fill in a spreadsheet, ask you team members to give you a review of their performance to date.

I see so many managers dictating in one to ones: you should do this, you should do that …. If you tell salespeople what to do, guess what? It is your action not theirs. They will not take responsibility for such actions and, in many cases, they will not even take action. Ask your salespeople what they could do and coach them to come up with their own solutions and actions.

After one-to-ones, ask your sales people to send you a summary of the actions that they agreed to. This way, they own the action and they will be more committed to taking it.

Sin 2
I know what I want to achieve from my team this quarter. I have created my sales plan and have set the team some challenging team goals, which I believe they can achieve. I have issued the targets, KPIs (key performance indicators) and goals to my team so that they also know where they are going and what they need to do.

A leader is someone that people want to follow; a manager is someone who people feel they have to follow. Involve your team members when setting team goals. You will gain a better buy-in, you make the team goals their own and, as they are more involved in the team success, individual members will want to follow you rather than having to follow you.

You may know where you are going; however’ it is very dangerous to assume that your members do. Treat everybody as an individual and help them to create their own plan to achieve the target. Establish what is in it for them personally if they do achieve and ask them how under-achieving could affect their personal goals.
Proper Planning Promotes Positive Performance

Sin 3
My team members would say I am a firm-but-fair manager. I feel that I do get the very best out of my people; when they get a big win they know I will congratulate them but, equally, they know I will encourage them to go out and get another big win. I am supportive of my team and they know that they can always come to me when they have a problem.

If I asked your salespeople ‘Do you see your manager as a problem-solver or an inspirational leader?’ which would you prefer it to be? Coach and inspire salespeople to come up with solutions to a problem rather than solve it for them.

Do you remember the song ‘I get knocked down but I get up again’? That is what this belief will do to your team. When recognising performance, include everything that your team member did well and ask: ‘If you were to advise your fellow team members on how they could achieve a big win next time, what advice would you offer? This way, you celebrate their success, you recognise everything they did well and you have confirmed that they understand the steps they took to get the ‘big win’ which, in turn, reinforces the process they need to follow to get another ‘big win’.

Sin 4
My team are all experienced and they have a natural and structured sales process that they follow. They have had product training and sales training so they are equipped with the knowledge and skills needed to do a good job. I continuously develop my team members by listening in or going on customer visits so that I can show them how ‘it’s done’ and advise them on what they could do to improve.

Knowledge and skills training are without doubt necessary. However, one little thing that makes a big difference is missing from the above statement… and that is attitude. To create top performers you need to develop their skills to achieve; however, if you do not also develop their will to achieve – their attitude to succeed – you are wasting your time and your money.

By going on visits with the belief that you need to ‘show them how it’s done’, you are effectively giving the message to your team members that you are better than them and that they are doing things wrong. To gain more from your salespeople, coach them.

When you go on visits, sit back and watch them: see them demonstrate the sales process; ask them what they feel they did well, what they feel they could have done better; and coach them to implement the changes in the next meting. Your team members will feel more confident, motivated to show you that they can improve in the next visit, and supported by you.

Sin 5
I know my team well and have a very good relationship with them. I know who my top-performers are from the sales figures and I encourage my average and under- performers to learn from them. I reward my top-performers by providing them with cash incentives and the opportunity to gain management development training so that they can, one day, further their career.

Forget about sales figures for a moment and make a list of the top 5 attributes of a top-performer? Beside each of the attributes, list the team members who hold that attribute. Now look at your sales figures and compare the list.

What steps could you take to develop all of your team members to have all of the attributes of a top-performer, make a plan and take action to develop each individual. That is how to increase the number of top-performers and your sales figures.

Cash incentives do not motivate everyone and most salespeople hate the top-performer being ‘paraded’ in front of them – doing this can actually demotivate some of your salespeople – so establish each individual’s motivational drivers.

Your top salespeople may not necessarily be the best managers. Identify the skills they already have and develop the skills they lack before talking about management development, otherwise you could be setting them up for a fall.

Sin 6
The current economic climate is certainly a big cause for concern and these are challenging times for my team. Over the last year, I have over-achieved my team targets and increased the team’s productivity; however, my team has let me down in the past few months and sales results have dropped as customers feel the pinch of the credit crunch.

You have probably heard the saying ‘There is no “I” in team’. Your team is a reflection of you. If they fail, you fail; if they over-achieve, you over-achieve. Managers who claim the success and blame the under-achievement of their team are limiting both their own and their team’s performance. A team will only follow a leader who supports them, so stand by your team.

If you believe the downturn is to blame for your sales results then you are giving your team the perfect excuse to blame their under-performance on the recession and you could be giving your team a ‘limiting belief’. To get the very best out of your team, start talking about any opportunities the recession could bring and brainstorm ideas on how you can use this approach with your clients to retain customer spend.

Sin 7
It is a competitive market place that I work in, so my salespeople need to be hungry to earn money; they need to be driven by targets; they need to be ambitious, tenacious and they must be able to ‘talk the talk’.

Salespeople do need to be goal-oriented and focused on achieving results. However; a target is not a salesperson’s goal. A target is a means for the salesperson to achieve their goals. Therefore, to get the very best out of your team members, establish what their real goals are.

In today’s climate salespeople who are more customer-focused than ‘hungry’ are the salespeople who will continue to be successful, so develop their relationship-building skills to develop your pipeline.

‘Ambitious’ to one salesperson could mean something completely different to another of your team members, so check their understanding of what ambition means to them, and how they are planning to achieve it.

If you have got this far in the article and still want to learn more, then you have taken the first step towards becoming aware of why you may need to adapt your style. Remember, it is easier to tweak what you are currently doing than to learn a whole new skills set, so decide on what actions you could take and go out there and take them. Good luck

Work is a Christian Virtue

2009-03-15T08:28:00.000-07:00

I am not trying to make you be a workaholic,but i just would like to highlight some key points from the sermon today :)

Christian way of work

Watch God, Imitate God

God loves to work. He created Adam and eve, and the earth from absolute nothing. And he works creatively.Jesus used to be a carpenter , and He is a Healer too. ( see who said that we can be good in a lot of things) God rests on the 7th day.and we need to rest on the 7th day too. :) Treat Work as the offering to God

energizer

2009-03-13T01:47:00.000-07:00

I am running out of ideas. I hope I can be creative, I need new energizer to my life.

I am jealous people who can write a good article, I am jealous people who had so much passion towards something in their life.

I want to have coke !!!! into my life !!!

Purpose of Life

2009-03-06T04:12:00.000-08:00

I always thought I understand the purpose of life so much.I always thought I am not dumb enough to understand what is purpose of life.

But, today I realise I am wrong. I am not sure what is my purpose of life , why I am on earth for ? why I need to be here ?

Since I attended church , I understand that as a christian, we need to shine because of God. Coz every people will just leave the earth like this , but I always believe life after earth.If I am going to meet God, will I feel ashamed because my life never really make God shine?

Asking my self this , I think again , should I live for myself , or should I live to love other people? I choose the second one. who should be the person that I love , my family , But then, is that impact going to be enough?

Should I get a job which have meaning to contribute on people's life ? should I only go for money , but neglect the happiness for other people? I should be always thankful because God choose me to be here, to contribute for other people.

money , experience , status , is not the main driver , but people should be always the motivation to make you feel proud to be God's children.

New Soul

2009-02-22T01:39:00.000-08:00

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take.
But since I came here,
Felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la...

I'm a young soul
In this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake
But why all this hate?
Try to communicate
Finding trust and love is not always easy to make

la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la...

This is a happy end
'Cause you don't understand
Everything you have done
Why's everything so wrong?
This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I'll take you far away

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take.
But since I came here,
Felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

I'm a new soul... (la, la, la, la,...)
In this very strange world...
Every possible mistake
Possible mistake
Every possible mistake
Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes...
Take take take take take... take a mistake
Take, take a mistake
Take, take a mistake
(oh oh oh oh...)
[fade out]
(oh oh oh oh...)

My first ski experience

2009-02-22T01:35:00.000-08:00

lol, I went to ski last sun. oooo my gosh , is so cool and is so fun. is seriously very adventuroes, i am so scare and excited. and is sweet if you can ski with you sweetheart. by the way , is really memorable for me.

slide

2009-02-22T01:20:00.000-08:00

I watch a movie called 高兴

2009-02-08T21:52:00.000-08:00

我叫刘高兴！！

weekend is always a time for spending to be at home.
This weekend is a bit extraordinary by I had a lunch with Snow and her mum.
Then Houston and I went to Lama temple for a visit.
And we went to SunLiTun village for a movie. Supposingly , we should watch Australia, but we came and see a movie review called gao xing which means happiness.

The movie is about a man moved from a village to the city Xi'an. He came with his friend , and he falled in love with a prostitute. The story line is really simple, but it drives me to really salute on the Chinese never give up spirit and stay strong , no matter what happens.

I have a pinkie pet named Betty !

2009-02-04T01:53:00.000-08:00

lol, i saw my bro yesterday exploring facebook , by having a pet.

So , i decided to have a pet named Betty, is pink in colour. check it out from my facebook. She is cute. haha, by the way , i am like a kiddo :P

My Ox Chinese New Year

2009-02-02T23:27:00.000-08:00

My chinese new year , should be quite a relief time for me , spending sometimes with some old friends, family , and having so many days of holidays.

first, when i reached Malaysia , I just randomly went to UBS Malaysia to want to take the test, but did not successfully took it , due to some miscommunication.

Then i went on to Pavillion and Sg wang , for some shopping.

Went home by ee aik's new car, wow , is so nice, and also have random chatting with Hang seng.

Home Sweet Home , chatting with my family members. and also met some old friends like sook cheng , hui yi , cheryl , diana , ah kar.

After that , heading to penang , to meet lovely joyce and samuel.

Home , again to prepare the test., I finally clean my rooms , and manage to pack all the things.

Met janne, james and jasmine , through on my way to KLIA.

then , taking air china to fly back Beijing. Not a nice flight , I keep on have stomache , through out all the way. Sigh... Reach Beijing , my room, And take a nap.

Thats how i spend my whole chinese new year holiday.

end.

where is my fashion sense?Am i china pek?

2009-02-02T23:25:00.000-08:00

where is my fashion sense? why people keep on saying that I become more china pek>?

Lol... I feel so sad coz of this. I used to be ok in my fashion sense, but after stay in beijing for a while , i realized, my fashion becoming so Peking style.

Dear friends, dont keep on say it anymore. I will throw all my Pek style clothers into the dustbin and burn it !!!!!

taking test in UBS Beijing.

2009-02-02T22:56:00.000-08:00

never thought of going to banking line, coz i am a flirty , bubbly person, who wants to meet everyone from every where. Cant imagine , even talking to sweeping floow aunties, taxi driver, just want to get rid of , my need to talk.

I just know that I really like to talk , when I stay in Beijing. Just always looking for someone for some random talking, and also I just some how want to spend some times to watch some useless entertainment show( haha , just to fulfill my need to be sam pa)

And this also make me, to become a clown. I can just constantly talking to people. :P

Anyway, back to the topic, investment banking, some how , is so far for me , I love money though. And also hoping to earn more money , so that I can retire early, doing something which I like , and giving better quality of life to my family.

So , this come to the story , i apply to be Equity analyst in UBS Investment banking, Some how , also need me to spend sometimes , keep on telling people , is a Swiss Bank. Is not the accounting software company.The task , is actually doing some research for the real estate in hong kong and china. ( the job role seems like challenging huh?) One of the reasons , for me to enroll also because of enhancing my personal and professional skill)

I just finished the test for the enrollment, is harder than i imagine. first is the numerical test. wow, so many calculations on stock , and also inflation. alamak , I have been so long time dint really study, apa pun sudah lupa. Guess what, I dint manage to finish all the questions, due to time constraint. One minute , for one question.

Then the second test , is the verbal reasoning test , this is still fine. thank god , for I do , sometimes read some english articles, guess what for this time , half minute per question.

another last test , is the essay writing, wa lau , writing on customer complaint. I do write something , to utilize my good service , to customers. But...some how, i just manage to bull shit around some key words.

at last , i saw many people applying for the internship. So many competitiors. sigh.....my dream to enroll, might be slim.so slim....

then , i just went home , by hoping so much to cry. anyway, went home to watch ugly betty ( chinese version)

another " good news", my current organization might want to have some cost, saving policy, which related with high quality employee stay back , .... retrenchment coming to town.

Be my valentine, Yes I do.

2009-02-02T22:52:00.000-08:00

Be my valentine, Yes I do,
Be my valentine, yes.. I do
Be my valentine yes I do....

I still remember we used to sing this songs when I am in secondary high school, With, all my girl guides. Life back to that time is really fun, camping, jungle trekking, gathering ( flirt with some random scouts). And I still remember my ji mui gang, kuan yee, cheryl, hui yi, sook sook , and etc.

counting back to those years, it have been more than five years , i left my alma matter,Ave Maria Convent. everyone seem to be everywhere, pursuing their own career and dream. I am thank God that facebook does manage to connect some of us back , like yin ching, elaine,joanne.

Just wish to say to my old friends, Be my valentine, Yes I do :)

Fall for You

2009-01-25T02:10:00.000-08:00

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before?
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed, but I have loved you from the start

Ohh, but hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible

So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in, I'm yours to keep
And hold on to your words 'cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight when you're asleep

Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find

Tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

Appreciating Life

2009-01-25T02:04:00.000-08:00

there are many moments of life i really appreciate.

Perhaps my parents let me name to be Sze Yan, is to appreciate.

First, i would like to appreciate God, for bringing up who I am today.

Then , is my parents, my brother, my aunties , and my family gave me love, which made me feel warm.

Then , is my friends , who always caring and lovely.

I just want to be more appreciate life.

My Holiday

2009-01-18T00:07:00.000-08:00

LOL, wed, I am going back to my motherland, Malaysia. So excited about that, wish that i can be home earlier, for reunion.There will be annual gathering on Tues , for my company. I will be presenting a song( solo). getting nervous :)

Annoying Houston :P

2009-01-18T00:05:00.001-08:00

Today, Houston read a lot about rich dad, poor dad. This is a book whereby recommended by my uncle Jacky, long time ago, But I did not really spend so much time to read for it. He just keep on annoying me by sharing how excited he is for the book's content. I am piss :P

Keep In touch with old friends

2009-01-18T00:01:00.000-08:00

recently, I get back in touch with Sook Cheng and Hui Yi more often. The get back together makes me feel good, clear away my loneliness in Beijing. time flies, we never expect that our friendship can last for so long, and everyone is heading to different path. I am glad that i took the road less travelled, whereby, i see myself walking along the way, to make a difference. my dear friends, no matter when and where, I know that we will definately make a difference, by heading to our dream. May your dream come true. :)

The me on today

2009-01-14T23:14:00.000-08:00

at this moment, i would just like to yell , and say leave me alone.

i dont know where is my patient? i dont know where is my enthusiam?
i dont know where is my motivation.

is money your motivation, is money as your key performance indicators?

will your boss praises become one of the source which makes you happy?

will your tolerance make you become top of the world?

i just feel tired , very tired especially , my soul. seeking for God's love.

i want to be happy, happy with the place i lived in , happy with my job , happy with everyone

I know how to make it happen , is that with more LOVE, with low expectation.

today i rate my mood as negative 5.

There is a place called Myanmar

2009-01-10T23:56:00.000-08:00

today, just based on some random interest, I did some research about Myanmar, or some people called it burma.

Surprisingly, There is no AIESEC there. I am curious how is Myanmar culture, and place look like.

Myanmar which relates a lot with Aun sang suu kyi

Myanmar reminds me a friend who works in restaurant in Penang Road. Her sweet smiling face, and also her fiancee, a hardworking man in the restaurant.

Myanmar, will it be my next destination?

享受一个人的孤单

2008-12-25T23:15:00.000-08:00

已有太久，我没有用过华语来写博客。

今年的圣诞节，我感受一个人过的滋味。从来不喜欢一个人的我，突然，我变得好自我。

其实，我可以选择与别人度过，但是我却懒散的躺在我的书房里。

我已有几天时间在书房里睡觉。感觉上，有书伴我入眠，感觉比较安全。

我好缺乏安全感，自己待着，觉得孤单。

北京的日子好孤单。

我现在也深深感受到游子的心情了。

就让我过一个孤单的圣诞节吧。

I am going home for Chinese New Year

2008-12-18T19:49:00.000-08:00

This week had been a week for low motivation , due to I feel really tired. Not sure whether is from emotion , or actually phycially feeling tired.

The workload for this week is really less. So , I spent sometime to explore which new website which is interesting. I realized I have a lot of website which have My ID , managing my own profile really took some of my time. Facebook , blogspot, huddle, linkedin( which have box.net, tripit and also amazon reading list),gmail , g calendar,hotmail , msn, yahoo, ...... So it pretty obvious , everyone will turn into IT user whether you like it or not :P

I had booked my ticket to go back to Malaysia during Chinese New Year. I guess this is the only incident which really make me happy. By the way , I miss home so much. :( I can go to KL, Penang , Ipoh and etc. hmm... home sweet home.

This week , I had chat with my brother , ee aik and and my aunt. This also makes me happy.

Why I should feel happy this week?
1. going home during chinese new year
2. chatting with my brother , my aunt and ee aik.
3. went out for japanese food with Oliver.
4 Going out with Danny , Meredith, and some lao wai to Hou Hai.
5. Have some virtual frinds like Saltuk from Turkey and Iara from Brazil.
6. will perform on Sat for clowning.
7. Shi and I going to Wang Fu Jin for christmas shopping.
8. I will be going to 798 and Pan Jia Yuan for my art trip.( christmas eve)
9. I have Ajisen Ramen with xiao ma, and have a nice chat on some business model.
10. CHRISTMAS IS COMING TO TOWN!!!!! HOORAY!!!!

I guess when sometimes you just feel moody , should really list down why you should feel happy lists. Then you will know how to appreciate life.

Chaos....

writing in the NanJing Airport

2008-12-12T20:12:00.000-08:00

So one week passed, I never notice that my new job had really changed me.I start to like to write up something , take some photos , recording my life . read more books like Marley and Me, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, the world is flat, blue ocean strategy, and one more , The wealth of nations from Adam Smith.( My reading lists going to be more and more)

Although i have been so tired after work, but the tired is not different. This tired is the tired which brings you excitement.

There are always ups and down in your life. Life is just like a roller coaster. Although I just started to work in D4 project for two weeks, And i have been working from days to night , even for my weekend, but all this means a lot for me. It means that I am learning , it means that I am contributing, it means that I might get my reward in the sense from God , in the sense from my organization , in the sense from my boss.Now, I start to believe in team spirit, start to believe that there are actually nice people around the world, who are always be there to share, and to love and be loved.

I am now writing this blog in Nan Jing , a place whereby I been here two years ago. But now , when I come here again , I realized that i had changed. Grow up to be another person who lives in the society.

I am in Nanjing , Wuhu , for my work outstation . Meeting Moe,the vice president , of the Chery International ,and the GM of Middle East and North Africa region,first local Chinese car producer in China. He met a lot of people from all over the world , and have so much experience , in the sense of making his hardwork become valuable , not only for himself , but also for his family and the nation.I like to listen to his story , by the way I always like to listen to people's story, which makes me warm and more engage with this person.

His story even more motivate me to be a global marketer,i am really glad that my job now provides me a lot of learning in project management, art industry, the stakeholders management from the government, embassies, corporate, artists, galleries, museums, funding organization, all of this are from the world.and it also involves foreign affairs, marketing ,, Public relations, branding , customer relationship management,and advertisement.

So thank God for providing me everything.

I am ending my blog here before I fly to Guang Zhou and heading to Hong Kong for my outstation job and visa renewal.

Sparks with IE

2008-12-07T06:07:00.000-08:00

One of the goals in my life is to study MBA in London School of Economics. But recently, I have another choice.

I met a Russian, a guy from Venezuela , A girl from turkey. in the IE business school session.

The trend of business that they discussed , brings my attention.

This is the era , of age polarization, technology innovation , and also personal contribution.

IE is about diversity, entrepreneurial and innovation.

So..... This connects me with IE.

The 4 hour workweek

2008-12-07T06:03:00.000-08:00

Reading... is one of my hobbies.

I am recently reading this book, the 4 hour workweek, which brings me some reflection

People are not only pursuing happiness, but also excitement.

People tends to reward personal sacifice, but not personal productivity.

People should have the freedom to do whatever they like.

So what do you think about that ?

Art, Shi& I

2008-12-07T05:51:00.000-08:00

People always tell me that , left hander is good in art. But for me , I am not. I am just a normal person , who have interest in management area.

Not really have so much passion towards art. Till, this day. I received a call from Houston , saying that Amars recommend me to work as a assitant for a manager. I am suddenly stunt. Assitant????
I am not interested at all, is just sound like a boring job for me. But by the way , I am not thinking so soon of getting back to Malaysia at the moment. I would like to continue with my dream, be a really global marketer, hmm....so I decided to give a try to meet this manager.

" Hello , my name is Li Shi , I had studied in Malaysia too. Nice to meet you ."

" Hi, I am Sze Yan , a Malaysian chinese....

And the conversation goes on , I am glad to meet her , as she is not bossy , she is nice , she is talkative, have a wide horizon, studied contemporary art in Japan end UK , always visit a lot of galleries and also museums in Europe , and the lists goes on. This girl who are just older than me 4 years, had so much achievement in diffrent area. wow.... At that moment , I just feel like I really like her.

But , I did not work her after that lunch. I cant believed , how amazing it is , after one month , we are together ... in a team , for D4 project . And my role , is more than an assitant, is a collaborator, for this mega project. Shi always provides me a lot of space, for me to really work out what is the best for me.

For me , she is an art. For me , my job is an art. For me , my working environment, my life , become more artistic.

I am still on my way to learn how to appreciate art.By the way , thank God for providing me a good sister, Shi, an environment provides me space, an art + management project which bring me excitement.

My two months update!!!!

2008-07-04T21:10:00.000-07:00

I have been long time dint update my blog. No update due to I cant log into my blog, finally now I know a way to access to my blog.

Hmm , in the month of May. I had finished my transition with Mino. The transition is fun. and I have been learning a lot. And I went to Guang Zhou for APMCTC , the conference is so cool. I met Julie, Masaru, Tomo and many AIESECers.and we have room party. In Guang Zhou, I tried my first rabbit meat unconsciously.

In the month of June ,we have our first team day and team plan. We went to the spa place. I have my first culture shock with that. People bath nakedly in front of each other. But is male and female separately. and I also went to the China Ikea. The washroom there is super "clean", And i am so lucky that I am having stomache that period.

I went back to Malaysia for my VISA renewal, the chinese embassy is really "helpful" to help you. I feel being humiliated by people mistreat me.But all this should be fine , to be taken as a positive lesson.I am under financial constraint.. can be said that officially bankrupt. so anyone wish to donate money for me , I welcome you :P

OO yeah , My darling brought me to the Pavilion Fish Spa Place. ooo my gosh ., the experience is funny , i am like keep on yelling and laughing throught out my way , coz is so itchy. Darling is so brave , for letting the fish to keep on bite the dead skin. But me... i am like putting my leg for the sake of for the fish to swim around me.

I went out with Mickey also for yum cha.ooo my gosh... he is still so handsome as last time, but the thing is like I think he become more social expose. haha . DHL training really make him learn . LOL.....His blog mentioning that he might be in love. Really hope that lucky girl will be happy when she is with him..

My darling and I also went to Manhanttan Fish Market for his early birthday celebration. Although now , I could not be always calling him darling, But I am still happy that he get such a good result in the last exam. whooo... Wish him could get good future undertakings whether is in Malaysia, Dubai , or UK.

Hmm , Writing blog really make my mood become more better. Like yesterday and today , i am keep on piss off with people, but now all the anger also been released.

I miss you guys, I miss home, I miss Malaysia.

Bejing welcomes you !!!

2008-05-03T00:07:00.000-07:00

I am in Beijing now, the life is really fun and nice.
How fun is it?
a.People here are friendly. It makes me feel warm.First day when I reach Hangzhou, Charlie and Mungyu who are from LC in Hangzhou pick me up. They expose me a lot about the LC reality in China and also the China culture. I met many people during my journey to Beijing.Toshiba Manager, people like Tian Tian from Zhe Jiang, Hai Zhe from Hangzhou,and his gf Qin Yan from Shanghai. They are really nice to me.And I had wait for like few hours in KFC at Hangzhou railway station for my train, I just spoke to random people for random issues. They are kind of surpise that a girl who is brave to come to China for her AIESEC journey.

b. My MC apartment is cool. We have a penthouse as our place to stay. You can get washing machine, filter, TV,and everything. But the toilet is a bit problem for me, no worries , that can be cleaned.

c. My teammates are cool people. so far , I met Houston, Alex Fat and his gf, Joachim, Mino, Steph, and Mitesh. Houston had receipt me from the train station, he is kinda of cute with his welcome notes. Alex Fat is just random as Houston, but he is smart and kinda of funny. Joachim is a guy who share the similar culture background as me , as he is a Singaporean.He is also a christian. Mino is so homiez person, both of us enjoy to stay in the appartment, and she helps me a lot in cooking. Step invited me to party, I met some Hongkies, Trainees ( now working permanent in Beijing) . We had a fun time. And Mitesh looks so young, He will be my another teacher to teach me how to cook.

Next Mon , will be my official working day. I am excited about that. To everyone in Malaysia, I am pretty well in China. Here is really cool. please visit me if you are gonna to come here. Hugs for everyone. ;)

My update!!!

2008-04-27T07:01:00.000-07:00

Wow, getting excited . Wed , is my day to leave to Beijing. First , Houston edi asked LC Hangzhou to pick me up from the air port. Perhaps , my team mate little Nemo, who call herself Fish , will be there to welcome me. I have to take 12hours train from Hangzhou to reach Beijing. Kinda of worry whether Houston can stay awake to pick me up in the early of morning on Labour day.

Labour Day is holiday for China. Hehe , perhaps I only start to work on Fri. *sweat*, but now I have to start my work, from transition to planning. Kinda a lot of work to do ,but i guess i will like it. China is the number country now in AIESEC , for my coming team , our vision is to from good to great. I guess this vision is copied from Jim Collins's book.

For coming term for AIESEC China, I will be doing Talent Management which commonly will be known as Human Resources or People Development.Now , I am still at the stage of picking up information from the AIESEC International regarding model of development and competency usage in the country. Besides that , I have been reading a lot information regarding human capital like GE Way , Toyota Way , Peter Drucker's principle on Management and Leadership. I had bought a book called First, Break All The Rules by Marcus Buckingham & Curt Coffman. Is in the series of 800 CEO read.com. The sharing will be done later with you guys, after I complete it.

This week , I have been farewell with my course mates, who are Mai Keh Keh, Yee Zheng, Yi ying, Jea Chyn , Zi Yuan. Besides that , steamboat treat from my lovely boss, Samuel , together with his sweet gf, Ming Boon , and my fellow colleagues, Slyvia, Christine and the rest. Besides that , I went for the farewell with my brothers and sisters in Kim Gary, and we went to watch the movie of Forbidden Kingdom. Movie Review please refer to my multiply blog , which is http://syanz3.multiply.com. Actually , I have one more blog there , that will be much about my walk with God and also on some reviews and events update. Feel free to visit that blog , if you have time. LOL!!! And I also went out with Eve, Mag and May. Desmond also join us during mamak session. I am gonna miss everyone of u !!

Hmm , kinda of having complicated feeling for my uni life. This three years, I have learning a lot not only from my course , but also from my friends, from my brothers , sisters in Christ, AIESEC and MagiSc.I might be always busy but actually I do want to have more time with the people around me. 25 of April is my last paper , which will decide my final end with Univerisiti Sains Malaysia. ( I got my thesis on Knowledge Sharing Intentions, if you want to read it , I can send to you.)although , I cant say that I wont be studying anymore , coz I really have interest in Management field,which I am thinking of getting Master in International Business and also PHD.
But at this moment, I really appreciate God had given so much blessing on me , to complete my degree , and guide my through out the way.

I will kinda of connect my AIESEC XP,wtih my learning in degree to what my dream job , perhaps more on Branding , Marketing , Public Relations. perhaps also on training. Perhaps I want to initiate a consulting , PR firm and providing training which will help people to develop themselves in the future. But kinda of blur for the concept,maybe working in PWC or some consulting firm to gain more experience then only start to have this ownership of company.

hmm , Another story to share, After I reach home , I have been sleeping for more than 12 hours. I sleep peacefully because is my bed , and no one disturb me. And I am with my family, kinda of like peaceful feel and happy family feel. I hope my three years time of AIESEC XP will end with more learning. And I am going to start my own unit of family with my own kids , own hubby , own house, a lot of ownership.

Sense of ownership and enterpreneur spirit is kinda of important today , not only in household , but also in organization. I hope that my international MC experience can train me in this two areas so that , I can enhance my learning experience.

On 24th of April , I also received phone call from Houston regarding attending International Trainers Congress in Ukraine. My first response was, what , In Middle East. After my darling helped me to check , only realise is a country nearby Russia and Poland. Due with the VISA issue and also financally unstable ( I spent most of my money in Asia Pacific Expro and Leadership Development Seminar in Tokyo , Japan), ITC is just halfly subsidised which i definitely do not have much to cover the cost of the rest. I guess this coming year , I cant really travel for any conferences. But hoping I can get into Talent Management Unit which is the TM team from AIESEC International , then I can contribute in the learning for the members globally ,perhaps I can visit to AI office in Rotterdam , Netherlands.And most of the cost will be covered.

Coming in this end of the May, I will be attending Asia Pacific Member Committee Transition Camp In Guang Zhou.I need to travel around 24 hours by train to reach there. Wow... I never been travel using mode of transport for so long.Will update you guys after I had spent most of my time in the train by sleeping.

I miss those days.

2008-04-11T07:12:00.000-07:00

I miss those days. Days with my friends, with mag , eve and may hang out in Glo , Chill Out. Miss those days went out with Joyce for movie. Miss those days that I work for Christmas and New Year eve. Miss those days where I laugh and smile with all my friends. Miss those days sleep with Ching on the same bed. Miss those days when I hang out to Kek Lok Si, to Bukit Mertajam , with Yee Zheng , Yi Yng , Chu Kwang , and Jea Chyn .

I miss a lot of those days. I thank God for I grab those days , and I appreciate every single day.

I will still appreciate every single day. Days when I just came to uni , I dont find my days meaningful. Now, I have something ,something which i call my dream , my passion, which I want to pursue in my life.

I miss those days with my darling , that we hang out in night market , staying in Cititel , for KL trip , hang out to Redang, went to Cameron, watching movies, having each other. hugging and kisses.I really want the story to keep going , till the day where people say Forever Love is there,

I miss those days with my family , tuition in aunt's house. Aerobic classes with Aunt Ee. went to market with my mum,watching TV with my family members.

I miss a lot of those days.

A new chapter is going to begin , but it does not mean the story ends here. I really hope that my Father's strength will support me in my new chapter.

Greetings from Japan !!

2008-03-16T19:54:00.001-07:00

Dear all ,

I have seriously limited access to internet. This is because in Japan , we need to pay money for that !!! I had arrived Tokyo safely J , please forgive me if I did not reply your message , pick up your call,, ( is expensive to call or reply msg, and Japan only accept 3G phone, luckily I have it with me ) or reply your email , because every 10 mins I online , I need to pay 100 yen.

Everything is cool here. I met many different countries people , which makes me feel the world is not as big as we imagine. As an ASEAN, we share a lot of similarities in many ways. And I am really proud to be the country representative to share the ideas and seek for collaboration in this AP region, so that when these ideas turn into reality, so that we can create a positive impact in the society.

Miss you guys much.

Cheers,
Sze Yan

Leadership Starts Within Yourself and Motivation is the kick start.

2008-03-08T18:47:00.000-08:00

Leadership is not something that new for everyone.But , the courage to take up as a leader is not as easy as what other people think.

Election are everywhere , country electionn , MC election , LC election , US election , but how many of us think of those people who took up the courage to apply to be a leader?We are there to criticise without thinking how much contribution that have been given by us?We are there to say everything that we want but without consider the feeling of the candidates.

For me , I never think of want to be a great leader, Perhaps is just like the text book definition , leader is someone that lead a group a people to achieve a goal.Wau , is easy , just lead a group of people , maybe just 5 or 6 of them , then to achieve a simple goal , thats finish your task.
but , until i apply to be the leading member is AIESEC Malaysia, I know that is always about responsibility , commitment and motivation.

I got enough motivation test in this semester, my VISA application got problem , my aiesec first election is a failure, my thesis is under critical stage , my study does not turn up as good as I think , my industrial training is still pending , my relationship with God is further, i am having communication problem with my friends, or even I am having problem with my family member, and my beloved one.

Every time when I thought i will be struck down by all these, but I didnt. Every time I thought I will just jump from a building to end up all my stress, but I dint. I want to be look good, i want to be looked tough , but actually deep inside , i am not. I mourn before i sleep.

is a voice inside my heart that keeps me moving. Is it God is leading me , or is it "someone" which can be a leader of myself is leading me ? I have no idea on how is it , I just know i want to keep on moving. I dont want to give up until that day which does not really to allow me to do so.

Life is like a roller coaster, is always up and down. Life is like a rhythm,where by if you like this song , you want to continue to listen again and again, By the end of the day , I am looking forward my eternal life with my Father, and I know he walks with me with my every single step.

原点

2008-03-02T07:52:00.001-08:00

这不代表现在.

面对你我觉得好累.
一时风平浪静,一时狂风暴雨.
好讨厌这样的你.

无意知到你生气的原因,
我好失望.

你说如果不能接受这样的你,我可以离开.
我想说,让我解脱吧.

对不起,我爱我自己多于你.
好不想让自己受委屈.
好不想让泪水往肚子里留.
我累了.
不想被你的情绪困着.
再也不想掩饰自己.

我没有你想得那么坚强.
我也会不堪一击.
就让我这一个母之的女人,变得更加地无知.
我再也不想假装,装得我好好受.
但其实,我不.

谢谢你让我有过美好的回忆.
你依然是我的好友.

你要的他,我还你.
我从没想过拥有他.
我觉得他, 不属于任和人.
可是, 如果因为我,你觉得不开心,我愿意把这分安全感还你

就让我们大家回去原点吧.

My new updates !!

2008-03-02T07:52:00.000-08:00

Hola, Welcome welcome. Sorry lar, I know have been long time did not update my blog.

So here, comes all the update.

Hmm , lately, Study is busy. AIESEC is busy, busy with the second application and also going for Japan APXLDS. So , till now , everything is still fine, financial support , own self generated. Mental support , still ok ok. Hmm , a bit cant expected, coz cant imagine I am going to Tokyo , going to Disney Land.

Till this moment , I am stuck in my room , My city enter hospital , need to under inspection for two weeks. I miss him . He is my best darling, after my real darling.

Hmm , last fri , I went or DHL interview. My darling was there with me for one hour plus. Wa lau we, jealous leh , cant have a better boy friend than him. He was there although he is super duper busy. And the interview goes fine , I just pray hard that I can get in.

Not really a lot of things to share , but then now I just feel relax Don’t want to push myself too hard.

Ching la wei , visit my blog also don’t want to drop message and say hi. I am angry edi. LOL!!!hey , I am still waiting for our party night. When it will be, huh ?and here remind you that , next week we will have psycho test. And please let me copy your answer. Ha ha.

To Tango Teh, I am fine here!!! No worries .Although might sound stress , but actually I am ok with my life here. Thanks for everything. And please miss me and Hui Yi here.

That’s all the update. Adios!!!

Hey ,I feel tired

2008-02-20T01:52:00.000-08:00

feel very tired, physically, like want to fall sick soon.
feeling watching movie although tomorrow got test.
please, i want to study : )

Part of That World by Little Mermaid

2008-02-17T05:52:00.000-08:00

ARIEL
(Maybe he's right. Maybe there is something the matter with me.
I just don't see how a world that makes such wonderful things could be bad.)

Look at this stuff
Isn't it neat?
Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?
Wouldn't you think I'm the girl
The girl who has everything?
Look at this trove
Treasures untold
How many wonders can one cavern hold?
Looking around here you think
Sure, she's got everything
I've got gadgets and gizmos a-plenty
I've got whozits and whatzits galore
You want thingamabobs?
I've got twenty!
But who cares?
No big deal
I want more

I wanna be where the people are
I wanna see, wanna see them dancin'
Walking around on those - what do you call 'em?
Oh - feet!

Flippin' your fins, you don't get too far
Legs are required for jumping, dancing
Strolling along down a - what's that word again?
Street

Up where they walk, up where they run
Up where they stay all day in the sun
Wanderin' free - wish I could be
Part of that world

What would I give if I could live out of these waters?
What would I pay to spend a day warm on the sand?
Bet'cha on land they understand
That they don't reprimand their daughters
Bright young women sick of swimmin'
Ready to stand

I'm ready to know what the people know
Ask 'em my questions and get some answers
What's a fire and why does it - what's the word?
Burn?

When's it my turn?
Wouldn't I love, love to explore that shore up above?
Out of the sea
Wish I could be
Part of that world

In the mid night with Ching

2008-02-16T09:13:00.000-08:00

Ching is sleeping, sleep like pig,while I am working, work like shit.
I cant really relate pig and shit together, but some how, is just stuck together.
I am starving now, wish there is someone buy me supper!!!

Today , I don't feel good again. Woke up , found out that I have fever. Then , i need to take breakfast and lunch together by my own. Make up by my own. But somehow , i feel satisfied with my own make up. Work alone. Eat KFC alone, ( I bought one cute puzzle). This week money all gone. I am damn poor!!!

Took dinner with Yaomi, we have been long time dint chit chat. Have a very long nice chat. He he , feel like we should always chat together.

Been to Ching room to online.Log into blospot, facebook, Then Daryl came to tell me SECOND APPLICATION is out !!!
wa lau , but there are no EXCHANGE. some how , is expected, but i am dissapointed. thinking of applying second round , but my confidence have been shaken. Thank you for my darling who is there to give me support, makes me feel better.but by the way , i know the answer, I am definitely going for director , most probably , Strategic Initiative.

Then I met Yuki , to discuss for our APXLDS conference in Japan. have a lot to be planned , long nice chat with Daryl and Emily. cant believe that I am going out for conference!!I feel excited.
By the way , i have a lot of works have not been done.
Three tests in a row , thesis, AIESEC work.
wa lau we, i feel like dying.
Please let all these over,. i want to be free!!!

I miss my friends!!

Always On My Mind

2008-02-13T22:40:00.002-08:00

This song would like to dedicated to my beloved one, for this special day to a special valentine like you.

ALWAYS ON MY MIND

Maybe I didn't love you quite as good as I should have,
Maybe I didn't hold you quite as often as I could have,
Little things I should have said and done,
I just never took the time.

You were always on my mind,
You were always on my mind.

Maybe I didn't hold you all those lonely, lonely times,
And I guess I never told you, I'm so happy that you're mine,
If I made you feel second best,
I'm sorry, I was blind.

You were always on my mind,
You were always on my mind,

Tell me, tell me that your sweet love hasn't died,
Give me, give me one more chance to keep you satisfied,
If I made you feel second best,
I'm sorry, I was blind.

You were always on my mind,
You were always on my mind.

Elvis Presley

Happy Valentine's Day

2008-02-13T22:27:00.000-08:00

I might not good in words to show how much I care, but if you look into my heart , you are always there.

Chinese New Year Eve and I

2008-02-06T08:42:00.000-08:00

Today is a special day. Or should we say it like everyday is a special day out of usual day ?
woke up early in the morning , been to market with my mum and grandma. Suddenly , i feel that I should really learn how to cook. Sharing this with my friend. who just laugh at me , saying that by the age of 23, i still don't know how to cook is a cool joke.But, I seriously is a joker , who said the none of us is a joker in our own life.

Life is like a story , you are the main character as well as the story maker.
is really up to you how you want to make the story goes.

I am thinking of you again. Looking back , we have been having so many memories. But sadly say,. why all these memories wont appear to my mind after so many years. I just know i cant afford to lose you. Your call make me feel warm. If you are reading this , I would really want to apologies for anything that i done to hurt you . I know i have been very selfish , always put myself first before you. Always putting up evil princess face , asking you to do this and that. I asked myself , is that what we call happiness for both of you and me. I closed my eyes , what i can imagine is , both of us hugging each other when we sleep, Be grateful because everyday we see each other, having each other in our arms. But not , always making both of us feel stress in the sense of , maybe one of us lose our direction when we grow up. I am glad that no matter what change , your love towards me is still there .And i feel safe and confident , because you are my shelter.Dear, i just don't know how to tell you how much you mean to me , i know that by the end of the day , i just want you to be with me , no matter we are poor or whether we are sick. Is you that makes me feel, I am worthy, priceless. As you have already give your best to me , i feel that i should be doing the same, giving the best , for our future.

someone pursue happiness, someone create it

2008-02-03T23:03:00.000-08:00

Someone pursue happiness, someone create it?
Am I the one who only know how to pursue, but never create the happiness?
or Am I the one who always create happiness but never pursue?
Before this, What is happiness? is not joy.The difference between happiness and joy is the key element of sustainability.Joy only given by God, but happiness given by people.
Yeah, sometimes, i think i pursue happiness, sometimes i think i create it.
but anyway, i hope that happiness and joy always come along with me.
I need that.

*smile*

Rainbow World

2008-02-03T07:25:00.000-08:00

Never expect that I will start the blog with this mood, down..sad...depress,unmotivated,....
dint expect people will come to read this blog, due with low publicity..( sorry Adele and ching, i want to write something which is more positive, but at this time , i could not, i know you guys will come to read, but , just ..)

dear all friends, who are reading this,
setting up this blog is because i need some space .. space for myself to speak...space for myself to smile...
how long that i have been not really listen to my own heart speaking? how long been i have to act strong to face challenges, I am just a normal girl. I have my emo moment , moment where i feel i need to breath in fresh air,
i want a space , just me and myself, to sing like no tomorrow , dance like there would not be other days.

Today there are two majors incident which makes me not happy.
this blog is going to show you the very negative side of me.

I quarrel with a friend, a some how friend where i think i can trust, some how friend i got a lot of expectation.
just because of something that i say , which he feel that i hurt him.I regret to say that, but i know words have been came out. how would i apologize also no use. But my intention is just want to joke. perhaps my joke is just too cold, people cant sense it. end up , we quarrel.

well , i apologize, because i dont want him to feel unhappy. but , when i read his blog, i get shock.
once again , disappointment comes from friends. I hate this, the blog is totally with red, yellow, the colour which i hate the most. I saw many people leave comments, i feel sad. Tears coming to
me , and i start to really hate it, never feel that i will be like that. you know somehow as a Christian , sometimes , i just need to be forgiven. but , seriously , i am piss. piss with what the blog wrote. piss with the blogger, piss with the response.at this moment, i understand. understand that I am being maybe too over. but , i just feel that , the blogger do not need to hate me till he wrote that you know like some how...sigh..i just dont know how to put in words, but i just feel not not not not not not not not not happy, when i type so many not , i heart become cold.Tears again come to me.i just feel sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad.

This blog will serve a very good platform , to reveal my real self , instead of my another blog.

second, feedback from my team mates. even this drive me just become more demotivated. giving much for what i am passion, asking for the minimal return , end up ,i dont even feel that my effort being appreciated. being in a team , distance drives me , perhaps just a invisible person, i feel that i am being neglected. feeling lost , lost whether should i take up the challenge.

saying so much things , by the end of the day , i make a decision, i want to stay in a world where by is only me, me alone. i dont want to talk to any person at this moment.there are rainbow in my world, there wont be rainy day.

by the way , thanks for my family members, my friends , my dear who always be with me. I finally found out, the world can change everyday , but these people can always be with you , no matter what happen.

thats all i want to say.

Good night to myself.

*Rhythm of Life*

Growing UP

Down

Life is getting routine

Sleeping Beauty

LAZY :(

Happy 2010 and Greetings from Hong Kong

Cooking-My new hobby

My rabbit- Gigi

Stress

Poem that Ant dedicate to me :)

Malaysia Hospitality

和你一样

Y=mX+C

my time with Ruth CG

MORON!!!!save the world please

A for Apple

All in All

The McKinsey Quarterly

The Seven Sins of Sales Management

Work is a Christian Virtue

energizer

Purpose of Life

New Soul

My first ski experience

slide

I watch a movie called 高兴

I have a pinkie pet named Betty !

My Ox Chinese New Year

where is my fashion sense?Am i china pek?

taking test in UBS Beijing.

Be my valentine, Yes I do.

Fall for You

Appreciating Life

My Holiday

Annoying Houston :P

Keep In touch with old friends

The me on today

There is a place called Myanmar

享受一个人的孤单

I am going home for Chinese New Year

writing in the NanJing Airport

Sparks with IE

The 4 hour workweek

Art, Shi& I

My two months update!!!!

Bejing welcomes you !!!

My update!!!

I miss those days.

Greetings from Japan !!

Leadership Starts Within Yourself and Motivation is the kick start.

原点

My new updates !!

Hey ,I feel tired

Part of That World by Little Mermaid

In the mid night with Ching

Always On My Mind

Happy Valentine's Day

Chinese New Year Eve and I

someone pursue happiness, someone create it

Rainbow World

Rhythm of Life